untitled 7.06

i wish my mind was a blackboard
and i only had enough chalk to
write poems about you and an
eraser to rub out this poetic nightmare

i am the one you see as a friend
and you are the one i thought i could never have
you are taller, smarter, tastier

i run in circles, medium sized circles
and you’re behind me but i can’t
catch up to you even if you push me

i am the one whose heart always beats
faster, nervous like the first time
i told you i love

so i breathe faster and i count quicker
truth is. i’m anxious.

you scare me. you know how to bruise me.
and i am really quite fragile.

but i can’t tell whether to slow down
or speed up or stop moving and
just stay in one spot until you find me

i need you to search for me.
i need you to find me.

i need to go back outside
and i can’t tell if the straightest distance
between two points is a straight line

or should i just go
down the spiral red slide

copywrite JANEisnotplain 7.06