happy birthday: for maria

happy birthday



another year closes on the world
like an hour, like a second and
something momentous WILL occur
with the stroke of the hour hand
like reaching the pinnacle of
a sand dune in the sahara
or….



For maria andersson on her 28th birthday
8.14.08

gardening

gardening

down on one knee i

pull up handfuls of

wet grass.   i push

it and squeeze it be

-tween my fingers

in the hope that a

surprise will emerge

perhaps a secret from

a colorful cosmos now

buried deep beneath

my feet pleading to be

set free to find the sun-

shine and the spring

down on one knee i

am telling myself that

it’s a rather slippery

slope this searching

sort of thing but i dig

on through the winter

scars toward a fragile

newness.

JANEisnotplain  4.10.10

self portrait # 37: perspective

 

photo also JANEisnotplain

this is what it is like to be alone.

squinting fingers hang on near ledges

uncertainty stares up at me like old times

nothing whispers over fallen shoulders

i feel liberated and possible.

JANEisnotplain 2.15.10

1500 1.31.10 60608

lists

lists

i keep a laundry list

of things to be done

before i am the person

that i want to be.

things like eat less,

drink more water,

become a vegetarian,

pay my taxes on time,

donate a pint of blood,

finish the crossword,

cure [stupidity] cancer

write something profound.

i wonder if you

can tell that i am

working on myself

but not for you?

i keep a laundry list

of things most people

worry about but with

only a few things

crossed off.

when i reach the bottom

i will have only one

more task to fulfill.

leave.

JANEisnotplain 1.10

snowflakes

snowflakes


there are snowflakes as big as my heart and
they catch as globs in angry jealous winds
naked souls dancing through tree tops quivering
frozen in soft kisses around cold little feet
currently vulnerable waiting for warm hands
to defrost my fragile chest gently sneaking
through my window there is beauty. there is
wonder. there is faith. there are snowflakes.

JANEisnotplain

1.2.10 am

driving insanity until dawn

0745am 2010: driving insanity until dawn

i am at a borderline.// my personality meets me halfway.// but i am still Myself.//

i am at that /place where thoughts grow/ragged/and bending light/shifts through

words creating spaces.//

if i were to leave this space.// if i were to disappear into .//  broken atmospheres/

of the past/ of the future/ of the present/ crossing.// between/blurred boundaries

and textured contours?//

space is an illusion of/ depth and movement.// and my left foot is racing my right.// in horizontal timed rhymes/but i am still Myself.// standing with this disorder/ in order.//

i am an intersection/of zeros and ones/ at a border a/ cross between/ my life lines and sky lines.// but i am still Myself.//i am driving insanity/ toward the sunrise.//  released.//

JANEisnotplain

begun on 12/28/09, finished 1/1/10 at 0745am on carroll st.

BWiles Photography: Artist Bio

Brian Wiles is a photographer whose work brings that which is not readily visible, to the surface.  His camera is the lens with which he investigates the effects of light and line on an otherwise ordinary landscape. Rather than simply record his environment, Brian interprets it by crafting a unique interface with the viewer through his mastery of composition and perspective.  His technique incorporates the very definition of light as the essential condition of vision. The result is a beautifully unexpected palate of texture and rhythm intimately framed in an innovative perception that invites the viewer to actively participate and appreciate.

Brian’s work has been featured in …

for an upcoming west town gallery showing

JANEisnotplain 12/09

revelation at 0400am

revelation

4am or one hour before the
beginning of the end of time
and i feel a sad dream falling
slowly through dimly lit trees like
petals of white papers with black
words touching innocent sheets
on the line in the shadows between
truth and deception, good and bad
melting into an aged rain that
bathes the grass at dawn with
the spit of shallow weeds and
medicated repetition as the
so[u]l[e]s of my shoes become the
legs of my jeans and the day/i
surface[s] gasping for air and light

5am another inch of time creeps out
of fragments of broken monuments to
step forward into fragile enlightenment
trembling under fresh green skies
orange horizons fall eternally backward
into silver ribbons of sun awake

6am sweep the patio clean,
lie to the earth, swallow the spaces
stop chasing citrus thoughts with
bittersweet aftertastes and just
gather up all the blue lemons,
add happiness, stir, and
make some lemonade.

copyright JANEisnotplain 7.09

---from the 0330am series

abstract

abstract

hotel room. i am lying. on the bed.
my brain. connections sparking in
my eyes. a black berry stain. on a
white dress. altered. a butterfly in-
side a glass bottle. transparent.con-
tain[t]ed. chaos is beautiful.like the
strings on a cello.floating face down.
black cat. green skeletons. blue air.
fog. rain. sunshine.twice. the sunshine.

JANEisnotplain 0325am 5.8.09

expose

expose

to bare
to confess
to disclose
to divulge
to exhibit
to lay open
to make known
to present
to reveal
to show
to view
to unveil
to unmask
to uncover

there is implied danger and vulnerability in exposure
yet, there is a certain freedom in choosing exposure

JANEisnotplain 4.18.09

self portrait #25: artist

self portrait #25 : artist


as an artist, i live,
by necessity, on
slim hope and/or
fickle inspiration
so luckless paths
are no stranger to
me. when i discover
my partner is dead
i just go on alone.


JANEisnotplain 4.13.09

in reference to the current state of medicine.

de-fragmented

de-fragmented


the keyboard is unfeeling and
the words are darwinian evolutions
perhaps even freudian re-volutions

there is only the exit and the clock
the monitor no longer sees or saves

self

i am
this file
is un-solvable
or should that be salvageable?

up-grades, up-dates, down-loads
automate, populate, disseminate

my mind ticks and clicks
while it waits for its reboot


JANEisnotplain 4.09

insomniac writings at 0323am

self portrait # 21 : free time

self portrait # 21 : free time


my soul is made of tissue paper and words that
i have dreamed of capturing on paper to set me

free

i am a thousand faces in a crowded street
following in footsteps that have not yet been made
i reach for trees from porch steps to feel their glow
sink into my rhythm and imbibe their colors
i inhale the soft ocean and exhale hues and shades
i like to watch the sky connect the clouds of mind
dancing in doorways connecting joy and discord
i fall inside/outside the patterns of repetitious heartbeats
singing an echo of an ever changing life-

time

JANEisnotplain 3.27.09

completed while enjoying the ocean in miami

self portrait #35: thirty-five

self portrait # 35 : thirty five


each new year is
crowding out the last.

soon, i’ll be alone in
a room full of selves
i have never met.


JANEisnotplain 3.19.09

happy birthday

stain

stain

you never think of
the fruit of a rose
the flower is too dark
and wonderful and you
forget its only a prelude.

rose hips stain the snow
now,like blood splatter and
you should be warned that
her kiss will leave toxins
soaking in your skin.


JANEisnotplain 2.09

1.20.09 CHANGE

1.20.09 CHANGE


every everything
is available to
every [thing and] one

abstract concrete
hidden showing
[time space]
conservation symmetry
united survival

we are happy and sad
hopeful and desperate
by choice of thought
observation and attention

this is a magnificent and
sobering responsibility

now is then and
this is now and
intelligent people
[places things]
realize now and then
is never ever
[always]

JANEisnotplain 1.20.09

on the inauguration of america’s first black president

i miss

i miss making her smile, dancing on her toes, sharing a meal. i miss late night journies, hot showers together. i miss holding her until she fell asleep, waking up to her music. i miss her touch, feeling safe in her arms. i miss her voice, her eyes, the way she made me feel. i miss her hands, her laugh, her stomach, her stubbornness. i miss the way my heart would pound when she walked in the room. i miss being in love with my best friend.

there is something about her that makes the spaces of my heart seem insufficient.
but she must know this: that i am neither gullible nor blind.
i know what she did, and i know who she did it with.
so what really is there to miss?

JANEisnotplain 1.09

self portrait #13

self portrait # 13

i am i and no one else.
i am the sum of atoms and
a sum of seconds. i cannot
transfer completely to someone else.

i string words with care
and pisceanly realize that
things can be communicated in
other more complete ways.

i have depth of beauty in form and ideas.
i am not a highheelstitbitch.
i wear flats among dandelions
and sometimes that is all.

art saves me from science. and
science saves me from art.

i have all the right potentials.
i just need an equal to
close circles in me.


JANEisnotplain 12.26.08

for the want ad project

mathematics

mathematics


mathematics is considered a dry discipline
depleted of life. devoid of emotion.
alive in weird scientific minds.
guarded by chaos.

mathematics is a higher order
of clarity and holy reference
a swirl of countable channels
for primitive line segments to
manifest in didactic series
of misguided well intentioned
left-handed-ness.

but mathematics really is a
beautiful means of calculating
abstract concepts infinite-ly
intense non-sense on the
relationship binding slope
of tangent line to the area
below the curve to the unseen
notion of sums overflowing
with wanting.

mathematics is simply beautifully complex


JANEisnotplain 12.8.08